Tuesday, May 26, 2009

The Happiest Place on Earth

Uncle B, Samuel, Reilly, Kate, Aidan and our Mom
Christmas 2002
I could not find pictures of the other Christmases.
Our first family trip to Disneyland
Reilly's Birthday August 2000
Bryan is on the right.

My children have never been to Disneyland without their Uncle B--their "sugar daddy" of sorts. Bryan always made our trips to the Happiest Place on Earth even happier. Starting with Reilly on her 3rd birthday, Uncle B made a yearly trek with our family. The year the boys were born, he started the Christmas time traditions there. Slurpees in Toontown. Lunch at Goofy's Diner. Coco on the bench waiting for the Parade. Staying late until the snowflakes and fireworks. It's A Small World over and over again until he had a turn with each kid in his lap. Tigger santa hat. Minnie Mouse santa hat. Treats. All Uncle B-style. He never tired of the magic. He made it marvelous.

We stopped going because I am a kill-joy, a royal stick-in-the-mud; I did not want him wasting his money on frivolous stuff and extravagance for us. I wanted him to save for a house. Now he is gone. He never bought that house. And we are headed to Disneyland for the first time in almost five years. Without my brother. It is bittersweet. I am praying for more sweet tomorrow when the children's joy, peels of giggles, and twinkling eyes remind me of Bryan. But it won't be the same. Especially not gumbo in sourdough bowls in New Orleans or The Pirates of the Caribbean. I am not even sure I am going to attempt it. That lump is back in my throat. In my heart.

But it will be good. The boys, my mom, and my hubby are all celebrating their birthdays. And it is the Happiest Place on Earth after all. And Bryan is in the Happiest Place Ever. So I guess that may be as good as it gets for now.


Lynette said...

Thanks for letting the Varnell family share your day with you. Birthday parties in Tomorrowland with homemade cupcakes are the very best! We just LOVE your family (including Grandpa and Grandma)!

Anonymous said...

Kelly, I am so glad to see that you are going on through this whole process of grief.I can only imagine how difficult it is for you at times.Keep up with whatever it is that your heart tells you!I love you and wish that we could get together more often.Maybe this summer.Perhaps a camping trip?Peace and Love to all...Aunty Ingy

WARNING! Tissues Required-Video Slideshow of Bryan's Life-Sorry the music was muted!